Thursday, January 26, 2012


Sometimes you get in a rut.  Sometimes it takes awhile to feel that you are in a rut.

I get up. Read my Bible. Get the kids ready for school.  Get Hubby out the door (after packing his lunch).  Do some things around the house. Pick Maggie up from Kindergarten.  Do some things around the house.  Greet Jared when he gets home from school.  Make supper.  Do some family things.  Put kids to bed.  Hang out with Hubby - usually watching some T.V. and then we go to bed.

Then I do it all over again.

It isn't that my rut is bad. I mean, I get the clothes clean,  I fix some good meals, the house is mostly clean. But somewhere deep inside I know that it isn't all that God has wanted for me.  It is only the start.  It is a very important start but there is more.

I know it.

I love being a mom.  I love being a wife.  But there is something about working out of the home that I do miss.  The interaction with people.  Knowing that I am using my gifts and talents to make a difference in people's lives.  Knowing that others appreciate me for more than doing laundry and keeping a decently clean house (ok - some days that is pushing it).

For Christmas, Rod ordered our Caringbridge site printed in book form.  The Caringbridge is the site of our journal that we (mainly me) kept during our daughter's battle with cancer.  I discontinued the journal about the time that Maggie was declared cancer-free for one year.

The Caringbridge book is HUGE.  It is actually TWO, yes 2, books!  Both are about the size of a college text book.  One book is my journal - all that I wrote plus the pictures that were on the site.  It also includes some of the guestbook.  The second one is all of the rest of the guestbook - all of the encouraging messages that were sent for us.

These books are my reminder that I am to live BIG.

Last night at a Bible study on some of the women of the Bible, we discussed Mary of Bethany.  You know the one...the sister of Martha.  Mary was also the one that poured the perfume from her alabaster jar on Jesus.  Some that were there started to scoff at her.  But Jesus reprimanded them saying that "She did what she could".

Sometimes doing what you can just means calling someone going thru a rough time to check on them or sending a card.  Maybe it means giving a quarter pounder to the person on the corner with the sign that says "will work for food".  Maybe it is becoming a foster parent to hurting children.

Are you doing what you can?  I'm tired of living in my rut and God is starting to show me what direction he wants me to go and that is exciting to see!

Monday, January 16, 2012

The Mailbox

Sometimes, on those really rare occasions.... I can get one of my kiddos to run to the mailbox and get the mail for me.  When they do, they take one piece out at a time to look and see who it is addressed to.  Then they clumsily bring it up to the house.  I usually know I need to watch the whole time because they often drop envelopes and I would, um, hate to, um, see a bill get, um, lost.


The kiddos absolutely LOVE getting mail.  My mother is great at sending out letters and cards and little notes of encouragement.  I am surprised that the U.S. postal service can't survive on her alone....  kidding....mostly.  ;)

I want to get better at cards and encouragement.  I think that it is a lost art.  In the world of emails and instant messaging, we've lost our personal touch.  The fact that someone takes the time to literally hand write our names brings added meaning to whatever is written.

When Dayspring offered to give me some cards in exchange for a review.... I thought "GREAT!".

But then I got the cards.

They weren't the cheesy kind.  They had real messages that I would actually SAY to someone.  You know? Not the kind of cards that you read and wonder "who in the world says this stuff?"  Ya know what I mean? :)

I really liked them!

Oh, and to be fair....I also got this really cute accordian style  card organizer - this one here - Card Organizer...   Isn't it cute!  But oh, my!  Just another thing that I need to try to get organized.  But so pretty!

Go check it out!  I am really loving Dayspring! :)

Thanks Dayspring!

Friday, January 13, 2012


I have really struggled getting back into a routine after the holidays....

We finally got the tree and Christmas decor put away this past Monday.  And I STILL have a HUGE GIANT bare spot where our 9ft. Christmas tree stood.  I kinda like the openness of it all but it still feels bare.

I have all of these projects that I want to accomplish floating in my head.  It isn't that I am not getting things done,  I am.  Just not things that will keep me moving forward.

I am going to - just for today - write my goals for the day.

1. Take shower and get ready for day.
2. do dishes
3. do more laundry - set aside kids' clothes for them to fold
4.  reorganize kitchen cabinets
5. pick up Mags from kind.
6.  read my Bible
7. run to library
8. go thru pantry

I am sure that there is more.

I'll come back at the end of the day and let you know how I did....  :)

Friday, January 6, 2012


Our son is angry at me and his sister.

What did we do?

She got cancer and I wasn't around home much.  She got spoiled (still is) and I was gone taking care of her in the hospital.  It, uh, kinda interrupted our life, our home, our family.  Interrupted is a "nice" word for it.

Do I know that this is the reason.  no.  But this is beyond normal sibling stuff.  My gut says that I am right...

The mommy in me wants to say "I don't care why he is mad.  His behavior is not ok."  The counselor in me says "That poor little boy missed out on so much."  Then the mommy in me just wishes there had been 2 of me. That somehow I could have been cut in 2 so that one of me was with each child when they were hurting the most.  But I couldn't.  I can't.  And even if I went back in time I don't think that I could've/would've done anything different.

He is a lot like me.  So much like me, that it is scary and, yet, he is better than me.  He is smarter than I am
(hope that he never reads that - or at least not until he is much older).  It is not that he knows more....he doesn't -  but his capacity to learn is so HUGE!  Like bordering on genius.  I am not joking.  He is a thinker (like me) but understands more than I ever did at the age of 7.  He has a huge heart and cares deeply about people.

So, I called my mom as I was driving to the store to tell her how she could pray for him.  Us.  Our little family.

As we talked,  I realized how hard I was to parent.  I was just like him.  My mom said how she feels for me and doesn't want me to make the same "mistake" with him as she did with me.  Poor mom.  I was a kid that was full of myself.  I was wrong and made mistakes and was stubborn.

But now I see.  I see the whole picture a little more clearly.  I see my boy a little more clearly.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Morning Routines

Yesterday was our first day back to school.  I decided to change up our routine to see how it would go and I think I am liking it.

We used to have the kids
- eat breakfast
- brush teeth and wash their faces
- get dressed (and then I would do Maggie's hair)

But we always seemed to be scrambling.  The reason for this is that Maggie is a VERY slow eater.  Now, it is not that she doesn't like the food - because she does.  She just plays or talks or whatever - she has been known to take over 90 minutes to eat supper.

I noticed, tho, over break that because we were having slower and later mornings (not eating breakfast until 8:30 or 9am) that she was eating faster.

So, I thought if I help her get dressed first that might give her a chance to wake up a little bit before eating.

And I think I was right.

I am still taking the chance that she will go to school with oatmeal or toothpaste on her clothes.  But at least she has food in her tummy and she is dressed.

Today she was taking a bit longer but as soon as I said that I would let her go to school without her hair done she got busy eating.  Silly kid.

Change can be good.....

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Happy 2012!

Today is the beginning of our new year.  Or at least it is in my head.  Because it is our first day back to school. I actually was looking towards today with mixed feelings.  It was great to have the kids at home and be with them and see them and do fun things with them but.....then there were the times that all they seemed to do was fight or have bad attitudes.  Or maybe it was me with the bad attitude?    Sometimes it is just nice to go back to the routine.

As 2011 closed, I wasn't really looking at making any resolutions.  I'm still not.  But I saw so many people making them and it got my mind going.

I started making a list.  My list got longer and longer and more things got added.  I still keep adding more.

So here are my goals for 2012 - and remember - these are an ever-changing list.

- Come up with exercise plan
- Read 12 books minimum (develop book list first)
- Find way to use gifts and talents more
- Do a monthly meal plan for at least 6 out of 12 months

Spiritual -
- Read thru the Bible in a year

- Have people over monthly (minimum)

- Develop syllabus for class that I will be teaching
- Blog a minimum of 3 out of 7 days a week

- read a book a month with the kids
- One on one activity with each kid every month

- Organize every room and closet
- Clean up storage space in Basement
- Decorate finished side of basement
- Develop plan for kitchen/office area
- Landscaping for our front yard (now that roof, windows and siding are done)

- Sell some stuff on Craigslist
- Have a HUGE garage sale
- Keep our monthly budget

I hope that I can be successful at each of them, but I will not feel guilty if I don't get each of them accomplished.  If I work towards completing them then I will feel that I have accomplished more than I would have.  I'm sure that I will share my progress here - or lack of progress .....   As I share, I will go into more detail as to what I am hoping to accomplish with each goal.

So, do you have goals for this year?