He is also very analytical and older than his years. He understands concepts that are way past his years chronologically. His love language is words of affirmation. Words can build him up in a heart beat and lay him down flat in a split second. He uses his analytical mind to over-analyze it all. Just like his Mom.
Jared was getting to the point that anything that I said to correct him he would take to the extreme. "I never do anything right." "You don't love me! You hate me!" He is so sensitive to "words". It became frustrating to have this 7 year old just beat himself up over some silly little mistake/sin. Frustrating to hear him accuse me of not loving him. He would be soooooo mad at himself and us. It was heartbreaking.
One day - I don't know what made me think of it - I told him that he is listening to Satan to tell him lies in his head. He just looked at me. I told him again that Satan is whispering lies into his ear and he is believing it. Just like in his book A Warrior Prince for God where the the knights have to fight off Satan, he needs to fight off Satan and the lies that he is slowly starting to believe.
Understanding slowly came across his face. His face softened. He knew what I was saying was right.
When he would get mercilessly mad at himself again, I would say to him that he is listening to Satan's lies. The episode would dissipate more and more quickly each time.
I didn't/don't want him to beat himself up like I do.
Something was said to me recently and I ruminated on it. I stewed on it. I have one of those minds that moves quickly, analyzing every word that is spoken, the tone that is used, the body language that is used when those words in that tone were said.
I started to beat myself up. "I am no good." "Nobody likes me." "I feel so alone." Satan knows just how to attack me. But I wasn't seeing it for what it was. I was just seeing me - my faults, my shortcomings - and the self-pity began.
Then I remembered what I told Jared.
"You are listening to Satan's lies!" "Don't let him win!"
How incredibly humbling to truly see myself in my son. And to have God whisper those words in my ear just like I did with Jared.
They say that we are our own worst critics and I know that is the truth with me. No one can be tougher on me than me. However, when it is taken to the extreme, I need to remember where that criticism is coming from - Satan.
Satan is out to destroy each of us. What lies is he telling that you are believing? What could you be doing for Jesus if you weren't believing those lies?
Satan knows which lie to tell us that will strike at the core of who we are and make us forget that we have a loving God who loves no matter what we have done, despite what we have done. He loves us anyway!
God knew that we are the cancer that caused his Son to die.
He loves us anyway.
How humbling and motivating!
Don't let Satan's lies stop you from doing what you have been called to do and called to be!
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